September 2009
1 post
“It rarely takes more than a page to recognize that you’re in the presence...”
– I Will Not Read Your F@#$%^g Script - New York News - Runnin’ Scared
June 2009
2 posts
FBI: Test shows Mich. man not missing NY boy -... →
I’ll summarize, so you don’t have to click:
NEWS: There was this boy who was kidnapped in 1955. No one knows what happened to him. Here’s a picture.
RANDOM MAN: I don’t really look like my dad. The boy is clearly me.
HIS DAD: What?!?
DNA: No, sorry.
MAN: Ok.
NEWS: FRONT PAGE!
Ebert's Gone Soft →
Ok, this does it. I have to say something — Roger Ebert is slipping. It’s been said before, but never before by me: Roger Ebert is no longer a fair critic. And as he shows in this review of The Hangover, the latest example of his faltering discrimination, he’s too easy on cruddy films.
Whatever happened to “I hated, hated, hated, hated, hated this movie”?
April 2009
2 posts
“People Who Claim to Be Afraid of Clowns:
“These people (and they are...”
– The Different Kinds of People That There Are - Features - The Stranger, Seattle’s Only Newspaper
We’re currently looking for a house in Meade County, Kentucky. I have been reading hundreds of little blurbs touting the fine properties of each. It’s really amusing, I think, how each descriptive paragraph is peppered with utterly meaningless phrases. What does it really mean when a house is “must see”?
It seems to me that if I was trying to sell something, and I had...
March 2009
4 posts
I am so right, butt-face
Making up a name for people who disagree with you does nothing to legitimize your viewpoint; ad hominem attacks are universally considered a logical fallacy.
U2: No Line On The Horizon →
In the record labels’ latest attempt (see: in Rainbows) to combat record piracy, U2’s latest is being offered in mp3 format for $3.99…today only!
Like Radiohead before them, expect the label to produce un-verifiable statistics citing the resounding success of this endeavor. (If you’re wondering how the In Rainbows Experiment turned out, check the album’s current...
January 2009
4 posts
Guide to dating: The classified ads of the London... →
The funniest personal advertisements from the funniest anonymous Brits.
WatchA new era of change!
via jeffrubinjeffrubin
Attention advertisers:
No matter what you’re selling, commercials that contain the sound of an alarm clock are off-putting. I realize that it gets attention, but I think it’s a negative association; avoid at all costs!
Dream Theme
Why is it that in so many dreams I have that someone in them will completely turn into someone else right in the middle of the dream?
For example, I’ll be duck hunting with, say, Ted Kennedy, and then the next time I turn around, he has morphed into my grandmother. No big deal, nothing is said, and I get the impression my grandmother in the dream would be upset if I asked her why only...
December 2008
3 posts
My Last.fm profile →
…is probably over and done with. One day it just stopped scrobbling to the page, and no uninstall/reinstall of the software could fix it.
So there you go, last.fm. I hope you develop a fix for this. I kind of liked your product.
My websites
Before I begin, I need to preface this post with the statement that:
I am by no means a web designer.
I know little about html, and even less about css. And let’s not even discuss flash or MySQL, please.
I don’t even host my own material.
But! That’s not going to stop me from creating and setting up websites! Here are some that I have done, or the ones I currently...
November 2008
1 post
October 2008
1 post
Army stops Iraq GI from bringing puppy home -... →
“[Beberg] said Iraqis view dogs and cats as nuisances and carriers of disease, and U.S. soldiers have rescued many of them from abuse.”
This is a terrific example of how being completely self-concerned and refusing to consider the larger picture can hurt!
If we allow one girl to bring a stray dog home from Iraq simply on the basis of the too-sweet picture plastered all over msn.com,...
September 2008
2 posts
The Other Side of the World Is not China! →
When I was growing up, I always thought if I dug down deep enough, I’d end up in China. But! Thanks to this map tool, I discovered that now if I had been somehow able to dig completely through earth with my six-year-old hands, I’d have come out in the ocean, off the west coast of Australia! Not nearly as fun.
Only children in Argentina and Chile have any hope of digging straight...
Smokey did what? →
I love Smokey and the Bandit I and II (and well, ok…III, sort of), but have you read the plot for the second movie on wikipedia? It reads like it was written by a precocious 8-year-old:
“When Cledus opens the crate containing the elephant, Charlotte races out, nearly trampling Frog. The Bandit saves the day by doing a backflip onto the elephant’s back and riding the elephant...
August 2008
2 posts
Oh, imdb, you're such a card
Ever look at the “plot keywords” on the imdb main page for a movie? I love how seemingly random they are. For example, the tags for “The Departed” are:
shootout
cop against cop
nipples
fall
cigarettes
How inexplicably all over the place.
Paris Hilton's mom takes offense at McCain's humor →
I’m by no means a McCain defender, but the headline of this article made me laugh.
Woman, there are far too many roaches in thy house for you to go exterminating down the street.
July 2008
4 posts
“What is becoming ever more painfully apparent is that too many people this...”
– Thomas Sowell, on Barack Obama. Sadly, the only concrete thing most people know about Obama is that he’s not George W. Bush.
best of craigslist : To my neighbor who I saw... →
ESPN.com - Dick Vitale - NBA Draft aftermath →
I’ve always tried to like Dick Vitale, if for no other reason than everyone says how annoying he is, but he just makes it difficult sometimes.
He’s just too uncritical. Now generally I don’t think that a positive outlook is in any way harmful, but in his case I think it necessarily limits his credibility. Some examples of the bullets in this article:
You have to give Kansas a...
My College Website →
Please bear in mind, this website is from a time in which I took fewer things seriously than I do now, which is to say, almost nothing.
Also note that this was prior to my having any knowledge whatsoever of the design/layout/etc of websites, and that getting cliche jokes and alcohol references in full view of the public eye was the order of the day.
June 2008
5 posts
Watchpile:
caseydonahue:
I DARE you not to smile watching this.
This, and the videos that will no doubt follow it, are the reason for the internet. Although I think the song deserves some credit; for example, would this video have worked with AC/DC’s “Thunderstruck”?
“(1) growing demand from developing nations, especially China and India. This is...”
– Robert Reich’s Blog: Why is Gas at $4 a Gallon?
Former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich sounds off on the reasons for increasing gas prices. Quite reasonable, I think.
“Lately, I’ve noticed that writers of action and suspense films and TV shows are...”
– from Dan Gurewich (full post). I think so. Right now I see this frequently being feebly countered by the “no signal” conundrum. What will filmmakers do when the whole earth is covered?
May 2008
7 posts
Personals From Nonpersons. →
Cowboy Deaths, in Descending Order of Degree of... →
McSweeney’s is hit and miss, but this one’s a home run.
Way to Go!
Not only did Monba not win, but in the ultimate horse-mocks-human finale, he finished last! Fortunately mint juleps are as successful for me as they were last year.
Kentucky Schmerby
I’m following up my successful NCAA prediction with a far less-safe Derby pick: Monba. Believe it.
21 Ways to Shoot Better Photographs →
I am going to read this, and hopefully elevate my picture-taking ability slightly above mediocre.
April 2008
9 posts
Mazapán.se - You Have To Burn The Rope →
I like how the title of the game is the solution to beat the game. Stick around for the song at the end! It makes the whole thing worthwhile.
My Wife Tires of Computer Jargon, Part XXVIV
me: one way to see if someone's stealing wireless would be to check your router logs on the wireless device.
wife: ...and your...spyware up your butthole...
me: [laughing] what does that even mean?
wife: I don't know. It's my computer jargon.
Remember this? →
Too bad I’m not much of a gambler. Some pretty solid predictions for the NCAA tournament, in which all Final Four teams are at least mentioned. Also — Pitt, Arkansas…was I right, or was I right?
5ives » Five modifiers you might have intended... →
Merlin’s top 5 lists are great. His sense of the absurd is fairly well in tune with my own; it’s easy to lose track of time shuffling through the lists!
“[L]et’s face it: the whole point of The Simpsons is to let us have our...”
– Techsploitation » Blog Archive » Why I hate The Simpsons An interesting take on The Simpsons. I also like the point the writer makes about the male in the family being the “stupid” one in the family (implying there must be a stupid one), and the wife, saint that she is, puts...
March 2008
16 posts
Stu did a muxtape! →
“When you examine whether the declines during Earth Hour were large compared with...”
– David Solomon: Rage, rage against dimming of the light | The Australian Pretty interesting. I guess if you’re looking for that warm feeling you get from telling yourself you’re doing something worthwhile and helpful, go right ahead. Otherwise, please consider systemic solutions. If you...
Something Highly Creepy →
This disturbing link via kottke. I think those bloodshot eyes contribute rather meaningfully to the app’s overall creepiness. The girl looks fairly lifelike, until she opens her mouth. And then it’s like, oh, hey, a computer.